Your Successful Personal Change comes down to How You Think

2024-01-08T01:13:49+00:00Change, Success|

No one said creating successful personal change in our lives is easy. Even when we want to change personally, professionally, and in our relationships, fear often prevents us from acting. Peering into the future can even be daunting, making us even more resistant to change. But the good news is that we all have the capacity to grow and develop — and it comes down to how we think. As we learned in last week’s post, change is a process that takes a healthy combination of time, patience, and intentionality. So, rather than bite off too big of a chunk all at once, start slow, be methodical, and think in [...]

Comments Off on Your Successful Personal Change comes down to How You Think

The First Hidden Secret of Great Communication

2024-01-08T01:15:04+00:00Attitude, Communication|

Last time we made these discoveries regarding couples engaging in great communication: (here are the Cliff Notes) Effective communication requires skills developed with practice and perfected through trial and error! Communication is real when there is win-win, and teamwork Effective communication is when we listen to and speak with the heart. We must allow the feelings of our spouse to “touch” us. Creating a sense of safety and openness builds trust in the relationship. The goal is to fully understand one another at the emotional level! Beginning communication with problem solving can be a waste of time We must learn to differentiate between issues and events   But there are [...]

Comments Off on The First Hidden Secret of Great Communication

Focus in the Right Direction for Relationship Influence


Remember Lucy in the cartoon “Peanuts” by Charles Schultz? She would always ‘tee up’ the football for Charlie Brown, convince him to try to kick it, and then pull it out before he did. Charlie Brown always ended up flat on his back. For all the times Lucy convinced him to try again, she always turned the blame back on Charlie Brown. It is often this way with couples and their relationship, the focus for change is in the wrong direction. Cade and Bea had difficulty talking, and when they did it would escalate and get negative quickly. They each had a laundry list of things the other did, didn’t [...]

Comments Off on Focus in the Right Direction for Relationship Influence



We had another fight. There is no way I am going to meet this deadline. We are just waiting on the lab results. My boss has no idea what he’s doing. I missed another soccer game. I guess we can just put it on the credit card. Any of these statements catch your attention? Any one of these things could be the cause of significant stress. And most of us are probably dealing with multiple things like this, not to mention the day to day “insignificant” stuff like where we put our keys, and traffic, and kids who forget their lunch boxes. We all experience stress. When our life’s events [...]


“If you would just change I would be happy.”


“If you would just change I would be happy” Couples may not say it exactly in these words, but this is often the meaning or what it sounds like. At least the idea or concept in their heads is “if you would just stop (fill in the blank), I wouldn’t be so angry” or, “if you would (fill in the blank), we would get along better.” Think about it. When you point the finger at your partner and say if you would change I would be happy, you’re basically saying that your partner is the problem. And if you go just a little deeper you are saying they are also [...]

Comments Off on “If you would just change I would be happy.”

4 Strategies for Courageous Change


Do you ever dig up a shrub in your yard or empty a plant pot on your patio and not refill it immediately with another plant or soil? What happens in a few days? On my patio the hole will be filled with debris, leaves and maybe a few bugs in a very short time. The hole doesn’t stay empty; it fills up with whatever is swirling around in the breeze. Our lives are much like this. When our lives are functional but not as productive as we’d like, we may decide to make changes. When we decide to “get rid” of something that’s not working so well then it [...]

Comments Off on 4 Strategies for Courageous Change

Steps to Setting and Achieving Your Most Important Goals!


It’s almost impossible to begin the New Year without at least thinking about making some kind of resolution, new promise to yourself, or setting some goals. Did you achieve the plans you set last year? Can you even remember what personal goals you made a year ago? Michael Hyatt says that 25% of people abandon their New Year’s resolutions after just one week, 60% quit or give up within six months, and the average person makes the same New Year’s resolution 10 different times without success. Ouch! Change is inevitable. Change is the very essence of life itself. But most of us don’t want that change to just happen to [...]

Focus Strategies for Life’s More Important Decisions


I’m not fan of working out. Yes, I understand the benefits are enormous. The older I get and the more I’m educated about the body and how it works, I’m convinced that being pro-active in a healthy lifestyle is much more worthy than the lifestyle I’m naturally drawn to. But this reality comes with a boatload of daily decisions that must have my attention. Do I spend the day convincing myself that broccoli is better for me than fried zucchini? And that those 15 minutes of sleep really will give me a big advantage at work? Is there a way to lessen the burden of the decisions I am faced [...]

Comments Off on Focus Strategies for Life’s More Important Decisions
Go to Top