Communication

Communication Transformation

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:46-06:00Communication, Emotion|

Frustrated by not being able to talk? Tired of finding that your attempts at problem solving just lead to negativity and high drama? Overwhelmed by conversations that always go south? We see this problem in both counseling sessions and in marriage groups. We hear all too often, “we just can’t talk without it becoming an argument or a fight.” Why do so many couples go down this road? Gary Smalley in The DNA of Relationships understands it exactly; and it’s exactly what we see with couples time and time again. He says there are four ways couples waste time and frustrate the process when it comes to having a conversation [...]

The How-To Guide for Work Talk vs. Heart Talk

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:47-06:00Communication|

Do you ever find yourself trying to communicate with your spouse and they just aren’t hearing what you’re saying? It’s like we’re speaking two different languages! The old joke goes that a wife calls her husband around 4 in the afternoon and says, “Hey, can you pick up a gallon of milk?” Husband says, “Sure, it’s only about 8 lbs.” Waaa Waaa. What we have here is a clear miscommunication. There are two different languages we speak as couples. Work Talk and Heart Talk. WORK TALK: Work Talk is the task oriented, schedule driven, let’s get stuff done kind of communication that can help make a weekly schedule. Work Talk [...]

Respond and Validate FIRST!

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:48-06:00Communication|

Ever start a good conversation with your partner, then out of nowhere it seems like it goes bad? Guess what? You are not alone. What is almost certainly missing is a simple respond and validate. There are very simple keys to having great conversations that do not escalate, go negative, or just go nowhere. Most couples who have not deliberately worked on their communication styles together get into (at least one of) the traps of MIS-communication: • They talk about the event or the “what happened.” In other words, they talk about who did what, who said what, and the “thing” that happened. This often leads to a lot of [...]