Self-care and knowing your deepest needs and beliefs

2021-03-03T23:31:28+00:00Self-Care|

As part of our ongoing conversation about good communication, we wanted to bring up self-care once again. You may remember Susan and me writing about self-care in August. And it’s just as important to talk about now because when couples find themselves arguing too much or not connecting quite like they used to, the odds are pretty high that one or both of them has stopped taking care of themselves. And it’s hurting their marriage. Self-care means eating healthy, exercising, being independent, etc. But on a deeper level, it involves taking control of your feelings, thoughts, and emotional well-being so that you not only love yourself but love others well [...]

Self-care and the benefits in your marriage

2020-08-19T21:31:25+00:00Self-Care|

Some of you might remember an earlier post on The Fear Dance. It showed how fear not only keeps us from feeling emotionally safe in our marriage but also how easy it is to be too dependent on others for our happiness and fulfillment. We see it all the time — one spouse starts this unhealthy cycle, and the other follows. Well, as I was writing on self-care and the benefits it has for your marriage, it dawned on me how perfect a segue that previous post is for this conversation.   You may hear self-care and think, “That sounds selfish.” Well, yes and no. Being selfish means making others’ [...]

How to be Grateful for Opportunities vs. Overwhelmed by Responsibilities

2020-12-16T23:25:11+00:00Expectations, Focus|

Let’s be honest.  This time of year is hectic and you may be overwhelmed by responsibilities! Travel – Shopping – Cooking – Cleaning – Perfect Gifts – More guests in your home I get it.  A lot is going on, and the expectations of the season seem to grow each year.  Why do we let ourselves get sucked into this whirlwind of responsibilities? THINGS THAT SUCK US IN My family always made a huge deal of the holidays, and it wasn’t done right unless everyone was completely exhausted and broke at the beginning of the new year. As a kid, we didn’t have much, and now that I’m more financially [...]

Imagine Your Happy Family Holiday

2017-12-22T14:24:43+00:00Expectations, Family|

“If you knew my family you would understand”!! Recently I heard from a young woman who was sad and rather depressed about the holiday season. Her parents had passed away unexpectedly around Christmas when she young. The following years had not been happy experiences during the holidays. Her current husband’s family had some “real issues” including anger and alcohol. But family is family and she had to participate. “How can I enjoy the holidays rather than dreading them and making myself depressed”? Separation at the holidays from loved ones, a history of negative experiences and difficult people can make an otherwise joyful and celebratory holiday a real downer. But you [...]

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