Retirement and How It May Affect Your Marriage

2018-07-23T18:33:33+00:00Expectations, Relationships|

Retirement is a huge subject of concern for 10,000 Baby Boomers who turn 65 every day and have hit or are about to transition to this next stage of life. As a couple, there are some basic relationship guidelines that can help you both prepare for this stage and make the move less stressful. It may even make retirement fun. I know lots of couples who have made the transition (maybe not super smoothly), and have grown closer as a couple as they learned to thrive in this new stage of life. Good Things about Retirement: 1) More time together to pursue common interests (travel, family, sports, hobbies) 2) A [...]

Avoid Marriage Fractures by Discussing Expectations

2018-09-09T18:17:08+00:00Communication, Expectations|

Think of something you treasure. It might be a valuable heirloom clock, a Civil War gun passed down through the family, your great grandmother’s china, or a handkerchief given to you by your mother on your wedding day.  What would your expectations be about protecting this treasure. What words would you use to describe this treasure? VALUABLE, CHERISHED, SPECIAL, ONE-OF-A-KIND SENTIMENTAL, HEIRLOOM, PRICELESS All of these words could be used to describe something you hold dear and precious. Typically we take good care of these items by keeping them safe. We store them for use on special occasions and make sure they don’t get abused. So if this is the [...]

Imagine Your Happy Family Holiday

2017-12-22T14:24:43+00:00Expectations, Family|

“If you knew my family you would understand”!! Recently I heard from a young woman who was sad and rather depressed about the holiday season. Her parents had passed away unexpectedly around Christmas when she young. The following years had not been happy experiences during the holidays. Her current husband’s family had some “real issues” including anger and alcohol. But family is family and she had to participate. “How can I enjoy the holidays rather than dreading them and making myself depressed”? Separation at the holidays from loved ones, a history of negative experiences and difficult people can make an otherwise joyful and celebratory holiday a real downer. But you [...]

Make Holiday Hopes and Expectations into Realities

2017-12-02T13:48:22+00:00Expectations, Stress|

“I hate the holidays!” It absolutely hurt my heart to hear a man say this to me not too long ago. The holidays were around the corner and every year it became a fight with his wife on where they would go, who they would see, what they were going to do and other expectations. Someone in the family was going to get their feelings hurt. And so, they would take it out on each other. Disappointment. Hurt feelings. Fights. Holiday hopes and realities can seem to be utterly opposed to each other. Our general expectations for the holiday season are excitement, a time of peace and celebration. It’s a [...]

WEEKEND WARRIOR – Moving the To Do List to the Ta Da List

2017-07-20T23:31:07+00:00Expectations, Friendship, Strategy|

Most weekends Mike and I have some time off together.  We are married, mutually responsible home owners, entrepreneurs and parents. This gives us ample opportunity each weekend to have an entire list of tasks/projects and expectations to accomplish them. Add to that: attending worship, finding social time together and enjoying friends, and we have enough to fill up way more than 2 days. Our usual MO is to make a running list of tasks and projects that we keep on the counter and mark things off of as they are completed. This method accomplishes several things: […]