Glenn Kimball, Author at Mike and Susan Dawson ⋆ Page 20 of 22

Exponential Value in Long Term Relationships

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:46-06:00Relationships|

The older I get the more I’m impressed with how long-term relationships enrich my life. This not only applies to my spouse of almost 35 years but many other people who I love and adore. I recently sat around a table with family, some long-term friends and some longer term friends. We were planning a Dawson family celebration and each person brought a unique talent and perspective on what might be fun and meaningful from the history that we had shared over the years. I was suddenly overwhelmed by a feeling of gratitude and love for these special people who were once again pouring into the life of our family, [...]

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Communication Transformation

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:46-06:00Communication, Emotion|

Frustrated by not being able to talk? Tired of finding that your attempts at problem solving just lead to negativity and high drama? Overwhelmed by conversations that always go south? We see this problem in both counseling sessions and in marriage groups. We hear all too often, “we just can’t talk without it becoming an argument or a fight.” Why do so many couples go down this road? Gary Smalley in The DNA of Relationships understands it exactly; and it’s exactly what we see with couples time and time again. He says there are four ways couples waste time and frustrate the process when it comes to having a conversation [...]

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The How-To Guide for Work Talk vs. Heart Talk

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:47-06:00Communication|

Do you ever find yourself trying to communicate with your spouse and they just aren’t hearing what you’re saying? It’s like we’re speaking two different languages! The old joke goes that a wife calls her husband around 4 in the afternoon and says, “Hey, can you pick up a gallon of milk?” Husband says, “Sure, it’s only about 8 lbs.” Waaa Waaa. What we have here is a clear miscommunication. There are two different languages we speak as couples. Work Talk and Heart Talk. WORK TALK: Work Talk is the task oriented, schedule driven, let’s get stuff done kind of communication that can help make a weekly schedule. Work Talk [...]

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10 Advantages to Using Assertive Behavior in Relationships

Glenn Kimball2024-09-19T10:22:02-05:00Relationships|

What is your approach to relationships? Most people don’t consciously think about their method or style of interacting with others. But I believe there are great benefits to making direct choices or decisions on how we communicate with others, especially if we want to have satisfying and rewarding relationships. Successful relationships are assertive relationships! When someone treats you unfairly, do you bring it to their attention? Do you generally express what you feel? Do you openly criticize other people’s ideas, opinions, and behavior? In assertive relationships each partner has the ability to express feelings and ask for what they want and need in the relationship. Assertiveness is an invaluable communication [...]

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Are you just Existing Like Roommates?

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:48-06:00Relationships|

Are you living like roommates instead of having the intimate, close relationship you want with your spouse? There are lots of reasons why we grow apart. When Mike and I were young marrieds with a little one it was easy to do the necessary communications (work talk) to make the household functional without stopping to talk about where we were emotionally. Expressing emotions can be hard for some people, especially when you’re stretched thin by the demands of work, family, community, and other responsibilities. Trying to carve out time with your spouse to talk about deep things may even make them nervous or anxious, which creates a barrier of its [...]

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Respond and Validate FIRST!

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:48-06:00Communication|

Ever start a good conversation with your partner, then out of nowhere it seems like it goes bad? Guess what? You are not alone. What is almost certainly missing is a simple respond and validate. There are very simple keys to having great conversations that do not escalate, go negative, or just go nowhere. Most couples who have not deliberately worked on their communication styles together get into (at least one of) the traps of MIS-communication: • They talk about the event or the “what happened.” In other words, they talk about who did what, who said what, and the “thing” that happened. This often leads to a lot of [...]

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4 Strategies for Courageous Change

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:49-06:00Change|

Do you ever dig up a shrub in your yard or empty a plant pot on your patio and not refill it immediately with another plant or soil? What happens in a few days? On my patio the hole will be filled with debris, leaves and maybe a few bugs in a very short time. The hole doesn’t stay empty; it fills up with whatever is swirling around in the breeze. Our lives are much like this. When our lives are functional but not as productive as we’d like, we may decide to make changes. When we decide to “get rid” of something that’s not working so well then it [...]

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Forgiveness-Who is it Really For?

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:50-06:00Foregiveness|

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." - Mahatma Gandhi To forgive is one of the hardest things we do. The process can be so misunderstood, and yet it is so necessary. Why should I be forgiving when the other person is the one who has inflicted pain on me? An excellent question! But first, let’s look at what it is and what forgiveness means. Webster’s says: To give up resentment Stop being angry with Pardon Give up all claim to punish Overlook Cancel a debt Another way to look at forgiveness is to see it as a step toward re-establishing an intimate relationship!! The [...]

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The “Movie Theater” Attitude for Couples

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:50-06:00Relationships|

We recently went to the movies, and when we came out, Susan said, “That was a good movie, I enjoyed it. It was romantic, but at times also sad.” I thought to myself, “Really? What movie did she see?” It was a great movie! On that, we agreed. But my first thoughts about it were that it was full of action and suspense. What just happened? Now, we both went to the same movie. We heard the same words and saw the same images. We listened to the same soundtrack, accompanying the same actors saying the same words. But we had two completely different interpretations. In life and apparently in [...]

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Understand and Handle Your Anger for Better Relationships

Glenn Kimball2024-01-08T01:17:51-06:00Emotion|

Anger is probably the most misunderstood of all our emotions. We generally think of it as more of a behavior than an emotion. Words like screaming, throwing, intimidating, and even harming, all come to mind. But anger is first of all an emotion (one that we all experience!), and it is important to differentiate between the feeling of anger and the expression or behavior of it! Anger can certainly be a powerful, controlling, and even dangerous emotion when it is not understood and dealt with through appropriate behaviors. The effect of anger on loving, intimate relationships is especially dangerous. But anger in and of itself is not bad; it is [...]

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