Heart Archives ⋆ Mike and Susan Dawson

Does Being in Love Come from the Brain or Heart?

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:12:36+00:00Emotion, Heart|

Most people don’t think about what is happening in their brains when they are in love. It’s all about the heart, right? After all, Cupid doesn’t shoot an arrow at your brain on Valentine’s Day — he points it at your heart! And everything that happens when you are in love, as your heart races and the mere sight of that special someone takes your breath away, can only be described as a giant ball of feel-good emotions. So, it’s natural that anyone with a brain would shout HEART if asked, “does being in love come from the brain or heart?” Do you really know why and how you love [...]

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Side-Step Miscommunication with Empathy and Generosity

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:12:41+00:00Generosity, Heart|

Why is communicating with each other so difficult? Think about it: perhaps you’ve expressed a need that you want your husband to fulfill, and you think the message is clear. Yet he completely doesn’t get it or mistakes your tone for nagging. Meanwhile, your husband thinks his needs have fallen on deaf ears. You’ve essentially got two people who love each other but aren’t on the same page, and more often than not, this leads to plenty of conflicts. Miscommunication can be so overwhelming, and finding a solution seems impossible. But what I’ve found is that avoiding miscommunication in relationships starts with showing empathy and generosity. That sounds too simple [...]

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Understanding your Spouses Real Desires that Lie Beneath the Surface

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:12:42+00:00Heart|

James 4:1 tells us that our conflicts come from the desires that battle within us. So, if that’s true — and trust me, it is — then we should make more of an effort to recognize our spouse’s real desires and improve our communication. Not only would this mindset shift change how we talk to each other, but it would also improve how we perceive our partner’s intentions. As we continue into this new year, it’s important to recognize the many damaging patterns in our relationships that keep us from communicating and understanding each other better. They are dangerous cocktails that keep us from having a safe and connected marriage, [...]

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Positive Change: Protect Your Heart with Boundaries!

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:12:43+00:00Heart|

We’ve talked about making sure the relationships you put the most stock in are ones that build you up. Rather than tear you down, they need to be safe, give you a sense of well-being and purpose, and lead you and the other person to be better for simply being in the relationship. Above all, they need to protect your heart. Hopefully, you have plenty of those types of relationships in your life. But if you don’t, how do you learn to protect your heart in the meantime? “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the source of life.” (Proverbs 4:23) “We need to be responsible [...]

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Taking personal responsibility for your thoughts and behaviors

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:14:09+00:00Heart, Personal Responsibility|

As we learned last week, the first thing couples should do when they’re having issues in their relationship is to start with the heart. After all, the heart is the center of everything we do, feel, think, and desire — it should be honored and treasured. The next logical step then is to take personal responsibility for our thoughts and behaviors. Taking personal responsibility might sound obvious on paper, but how often have you been in a heated argument and focused all your energy, anger, and emotions on what your spouse is doing or not doing? The answer is all the time! “She started it!” “I can’t believe [...]

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Why couples should always start with the heart

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:14:09+00:00Communication, Heart, Uncategorized|

Marriage is a gift from God. But no one said it was easy, even for those of us who think we have it all figured out. You know the feeling — one minute, everything is hunky-dory, and a shining example of a safe and connected marriage and the next, one or both of you is upset. There can be some really complicated “stuff” that got you to this point, and what makes matters worse is that even if you are both committed to working through it, you aren’t always sure where to start. Most often we don't start with the heart. Here’s a tip from yours truly: couples should always [...]

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Healthy Marriage Patterns: Mastering Emotional Communication

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:14:14+00:00Emotion, Heart|

We've covered a lot of ground on unhealthy marriage patterns in our last few blog posts. From introducing you to the fear dance to understanding the good and bad of building walls and the importance of genuinely caring for your spouse, we've learned that it's critical to break negative cycles — both as individuals and couples — to have a healthy marriage. At the heart of this entire conversation is the determining factor in our ability to make healthy choices — the ability or inability to understand each other and be better at emotional communication fully. Emotions are the Voice of the Heart We love the saying above from [...]

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What does every heart really desire?

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:14:49+00:00Heart, Intimacy, Uncategorized|

If you’ve been following our blog, especially over the past month, you’ve probably noticed we’ve written a lot about the heart. Not the physical, pumping organ inside your chest but more about how couples need to treat each other’s heart as a treasure that must be honored and protected. The heart is at the center of everything we feel, think, and desire deep down — and what condition it’s in determines the quality of every marriage. So what does every heart really desire? “Our lives are shaped by the things we desire.” — Thomas Merton In their book, The Seven Desires of Every Heart, Mark and Debra Laaser [...]

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Work Talk vs. Heart Talk: Avoiding Miscommunication In Your Marriage

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:14:49+00:00Communication, Heart|

A husband and his wife are sitting on the couch talking about their day when the wife says, “You wouldn’t believe what my boss did to me today!” She continues explaining her horrible experience, and, wanting to help, he rattles off solution after solution. He thinks that he’s hubby of the year right now, but to his surprise, she gets more upset. “You don’t get it,” she says. “Quit trying to fix things!” Sound familiar? This is a classic case of work talk vs. heart talk. Work talk and heart talk are the two languages we as couples speak. Each is important to ensure great communication in a marriage, but [...]

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Do you listen to your spouse’s heart when it’s talking to you?

michaeldawsonlpc@gmail.com2024-01-08T01:14:50+00:00Heart, Relationships, Uncategorized|

Couples come to me regularly to discuss issues where they don’t see eye to eye — their finances or children or, you name it. Yuck! All of us can relate to that, right? It’s all too common for us to not see situations in the same light. Our heart on that matter is not the same. We have different movies playing in our heads. We all make meaning according to our own personality and our own circumstances we have been through. Examples of the Heart of the Matter The wife says to her husband that he spends money too frivolously, and their conflict was dragging on because he insisted that [...]

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