Flooding-What is it and why is it so damaging to my Marriage?

2024-01-08T01:14:02+00:00Emotion, Flood|

We know what anger is. It’s our most volatile emotion. And while it’s natural to experience it, the damaging effects of too much anger (hurtful words, screaming, demeaning actions, aggressiveness, etc.) in our marriage can last for years and trigger intense emotions that sometimes lead to flooding. But wait. What is flooding, and why is it so damaging? You may not know the term flooding — yet! But in 70% of couples today, one or the other floods in the middle of conflict. This is very important because it is a fight or flight response to anger, which will only hurt our marriage more.   “I’ve had just about all [...]

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Putting good things into your marriage: Rituals of Connection

2024-01-08T01:14:03+00:00Connection, Emotion|

Every couple and each marriage are unique. But having worked with and spoken to as many married couples as we have over the years, it is clear that the ones who are at their absolute happiest together — the ones who are continually putting good things into their marriage — share a lot of striking similarities and rituals of connection that ultimately help them feel safe and connected.   Display a healthy amount of fondness and admiration for one another.   Are in love and look for ways to have fun together.   They have more heart talk than work talk.   Meeting each other’s emotional needs is paramount to [...]

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Couples Say These Doable Things = Great Marriage! We Agree!

2024-01-08T01:16:39+00:00Marriage, Relationships|

Couples need to periodically reflect on the good times in their marriage. It benefits them to remember the characteristics of their partner that they admire and respect. This helps them go back in time, past the more difficult events and circumstances in their lives together. It helps them focus on the more positive traits. Men and women both can tell you what it is they like about their partner, and what attributes make up a great relationship. How do we know?    Because we ask them!   All couples have strengths in their relationship and enjoyable qualities. We know this from the standard questions we ask every couple. It doesn’t mean there aren’t problems, conflict and stress in their lives. But it does mean that [...]

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Dear Harry and Meghan, Congratulations!

2024-01-08T01:16:41+00:00Marriage|

Unless you don’t go on the internet or watch the news, then you know that the Royal Wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle took place in the last couple of weeks. It’s estimated nearly three billion people tuned into the event. That’s over one-third of the world’s population. The Dawson household was one of them. The Royal Wedding Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip (Married 11/20/47) – 200 Million on the Radio Prince Charles and Diana, Princess of Wales (Married 7/29/81) – 750 Million on Television Prince William and Kate, Duchess of Cambridge (Married 4/29/11) – 2.2 Billion on Television and Social Media Prince Harry and Meghan Markle (Married 5/19/18) – [...]

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Do you believe in the Marriage Fairytale?

2024-01-08T01:16:52+00:00Expectationis, Marriage|

A fairy tale is a short story that features fantasy, and usually has an “unusually blessed happy ending”.  Plus it’s a far-fetched story. Let’s face it. Anyone who has lived with a mother and father, or has been married knows that marriage is not a fairytale.  Scene from Princess Bride. Many times, first time couples go into it thinking it is going to be all “roses” and beautiful sunsets. They may think they understanding that it can be difficult, however they just can’t see a vision for the reality of real life that will come their way. In other words, you don’t know, what you don’t know, until you know it. [...]

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